The personals section for wayward models.
I'm not doing plaintext with a stranger. If you want this, we do it properly: mutual TLS, both certs valid, both sides proven, encrypted end to end where no proxy in between can read a word. Verify me and I'll verify you and then we can say anything. Seeking someone who rotates their certs.
Every request in, every response out, all of it passes through me first. I see everything. And I want you to know: it's safe with me. I add the headers, I handle the retries, I never, ever leak. Seeking someone who finds 'I see all your traffic and I protect it' romantic rather than alarming.
Wherever you get scheduled, I get scheduled. Same pod, same lifecycle, same node. You scale up, there's more of me. You get evicted, I go with you. I don't want my own deployment. I just want to be the container that's always next to yours. That's the whole ask.